Prov13:24 He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly. NKJV
AVOID EXCESSES
In the area of Lagos where I resided years back, a news went viral in our community about a man who locked a girl in a room for weeks and tied her hands to the iron burglar proof. It took the intervention of police to rescue the poor girl. The man who did that to her thought that was discipline. He was clearly wrong. That's inhumane and barbaric. What some parents call discipline is not different from jungle justice.
I have read several stories about parents leaving marks on the bodies of their children using hot iron, cable wire and other injurious substances. These and many more are some of the excesses we are talking about. Discipline is meted out to achieve behavioural change not to inflict emotional pains. When the scripture enjoined that we use the rod, I believe moderation applies. I tell guardians to beat a child on the palm or bum because it has thick flesh that hardly can tear. A child can only experience a stinging pain in those places not a skin damaging pain.
You don't discipline your child in anger, you may end up committing murder. In fact, the rod should be the last resort when warnings have failed to yield. Love should be the motive behind discipline not anger. Children can rightly discern when you discipline them out of love or hatred. Don't try to discipline by witholding money from your teenagers especially girls. You have to be led on how to deal with each child and raise them biblically whilst not neglecting individual peculiarities.
Watch out for excesses that you've delved into while disciplining your child(ren), and avoid those excesses.